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American Idol Season 6 (2007)

 

April 17 -  Let's give them nothing to talk about (Country songs)

 

It's country night, and Martina McBride is the guest mentor.  She's pretty, and she can sing.  Since I'm not a country fan, about all I can say is, "Yee haw."  And "Ho hum."

Phil Stacey (sings Keith Urban's"Where the Blacktop Ends"): Martina thinks it's stiff at first, but the end was soulful, and she wants him to bring that to the entire song.  And you know what?  He does.  I'm not a fan of the song, per se, but I think his vocals are probably the best he's had all season, and he looks incredibly comfortable as he works the audience, even as Simon pinches Paula's nose.  (What was that about, anyway?)  Randy says Phil could have a career in country music, and he's astonished.  Paula felt he sounded good from the beginning for once.  Simon declares, "Well, it's only taken ten weeks."  He's surprised that Phil showed personality.  Which means he's probably gone tomorrow.

Jordin Sparks (sings Martina McBride's "Broken Wing"): Martina thinks she's awesome and tells her that she doesn't have to move when she sings.  So Jordin barely moves at all, except for arching her eyebrows and waving her arm about.  Her voice is well-suited for the song, though a tad shrill on the upper register for my tastes.  Like a broken wing...uh...record, Randy is blown away again even though she's just 17.  Paula loves her, blah, blah.  Simon believes she could win the competition.  Jordin then blinds us all with a smile that takes up half her face.

Constantine is in the audience, and he's flirting with me.  SQUEEEEEEEE!

Sanjaya Malakar (sings Bonnie Raitt's "Something To Talk About"): Sanjaya would have Simon sing "Shiny Happy People" if he had the choice.  Heh.  Martina wants him to sing out more, and Sanjaya wants to do Bonnie Raitt justice.  And then he sings, with predictable badness.  But, oh, the bandana over that mop of curly hair!  The irony of the song!  The gross flirting with the backup singers!  No, we do not laugh just a little too loud, Sanjaya.  We're too busy tossing our cookies.  Gawd.  Randy says it was just like karaoke.  Paula giggles and says that Sanjaya loves adversity.  Simon calls it utterly horrendous.  Ryan and Simon then get into a hissy fit with each other over Simon never liking Sanjaya.  Shut up, Ryan.  We want him gone, remember?

LaKisha Jones (sings Carrie Underwood's "Jesus Take the Wheel"): Martina says that she is really connected to the lyrics, but I'm thinking it's suicide to sing something that was done by arguably the most successful Idol ever.  And while it does look like she's connected to the song, she doesn't sing it as well as Carrie, going off-pitch during the chorus.  Oh, honey, I think you're in danger this week.  Randy says it wasn't his favorite vocal of hers.  Paula tries to make excuses for her.  Simon calls it like eating a hamburger for breakfast - that song and LaKisha don't go together.  He warns her that she needs to pick the right songs.  I totally agree.

Chris Richardson (sings Rascall Flatt's "Mayberry"): Martina says his voice fits this genre very well.  And I agree, but...what the hell?  The violin that plays with him needs desperately to be tuned.  Chris's nasal voice suits the song, though...at least until he goes off-pitch, too.  But I blame that on the fiddler.  Chris can't find the pitch when the violin and the orchestra are in two different keys.  The performance?  Meh.  Again, it's hard as a singer to connect when you're busy trying to figure out which key to sing in.  Randy didn't feel any emotion or connection from him.  Paula didn't feel any joy or love.  Simon says the vocal had no impact on him at all, it was nasally, and the performance was completely insignificant to him.  Chris says that "nasally" is a form of singing and then says his heart and prayers go to Virginia Tech since he has a lot of friends there.  Um, nice sentiment, but coming as it does right after your performance has been panned, it sounds like you're trying to get votes.  Just move on, please.

Melinda Doolittle (sings Julie Reeves' "Trouble is a Woman"): Melinda's weirdest fan experience is that she once ran away from a fan who was running to her.  Martina had never heard this song before, but she was completely glued to Melinda.  I hope it wasn't Krazy Glue - that's painful to take off.  Melinda comes out singing that she's gonna get it right this time, and she does.  It's a sassy performance of a fun, up-tempo piece (no doubt helped by the fact that the fiddler finally tuned his violin), and she appears incredibly confident during it.  She's ba-a-a-a-ck.  Randy calls it another solid performance.  Paula says she knows how to pick the right song.  Simon says it was fantastic and tells her to lose her trademark look of surprise. And she manages to do so.  Thank you.

Blake Lewis (sings Tim McGraw's "When the Stars Go Blue"): Martina wants him to relax and zone in on the lyrics.  Blake uncharacteristically goes off pitch in several spots, and he doesn't seem that comfortable with the song, although I'd normally say that this would be a good song for him.  But he has squealy female fans all over the place, so he's not going anywhere.  And the judges, who were listening to some other performance, adore him for the most part.  Randy loves that he knows who he is.  Paula says he has the whole package.  Simon says it was okay and then inexplicably starts rambling about Virginia Tech, even though it has nothing to do with Blake's performance that I'm aware of.  Okay.  He's safe.

Rankings:

1. Melinda - Hers was the only performance I really had fun with.
2. Phil - Not a song I could really get into, but this was his best performance and vocal so far.
3. Jordin - She's very good, but she's not perfect, and I'm sick of the judges pimping her.  One should vote based on performance, not potential.
4. Chris - His performance would have been better if the band hadn't thrown him off.
5. LaKisha - Pitch issues all over the place, but at least she looked like she was getting into the song.
6. Blake - Pitch issues, and he seemed really distracted and not into the song at all.
7. Sanjaya - Your fifteen minutes were up eight weeks ago.  Go home.  Now.

Bottom 3 on April 18 Results Show (in order announced):  Sanjaya Malakar, LaKisha Jones, Blake Lewis

Eliminated:  Sanjaya Malakar (yeeeeeeeeehawwwwwww!)

 

Review 2007 by Patricia Lowhorn.  For comments, e-mail tricia@lowhorn.org.

 

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