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American Idol Season 8 (2009)

 

March 5 - What have you got to do to make me love you?  (Semi-Finals: Wild Card Round)

 

Now that we know who the top nine boring contestants this year are, it's time for the judges to wow us with their skills at picking bland singers.  Eight contestants get to sing about one minute of a new song to show what they can do, and at the end of the show, the judges deliver their verdict. 

 

Jesse Langseth (sings Rufus/Chaka Khan's "Tell Me Something Good"):  She takes command of the stage, if not quite the singing.  I'm on the fence with this one.  Randy gives her props for the interesting song choice but wasn't sure it was great.  Kara likes her swagger and calls her "Sasha Fierce."  Um, okay.  Paula's impressed with her tenacity.  Simon calls it a lot, lot better than the first time, but he thought the song and performance were slightly indulgent.

 

Matt Giraud (sings The Jackson 5's "Who's Lovin' You"):  Okay, it's miles better than the Coldplay slaughter.  Like, as many miles as the moon is from the earth.  Thank.  You.  Kara thanks him for bringing back the bluesy, soulful Matt.  Paula says it's the right zone for him and tells him not to go against what he's great at.  Simon calls the performance a billion times better than last week, but he hates what Matt's wearing.  Uh, Simon, the stylists start in next week.  It doesn't matter.  Randy tells Matt that this is what he wants and says it was hawt.

 

Megan Corkrey (sings K. T. Tunstall's "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree"):  She's trying to do the twist up there.  Can we come up with another move, please?  Boring song, weird performance.  Katherine McPhee did it better.  I know she's one of the judges' darlings, but I'm not feeling this performance at all.  But of course the judges love her.  Paula says she looks beautiful and she picked the right song.  Simon thinks she's terrific and current, even though it wasn't the best vocal.  Randy says the song choice was nice.  Kara believes they need her, because she gives some variety.

 

Von Smith (sings Elton John's "Sorry Seems To Be the Hardest Word"):  What have you got to do to make me love you?  Pick a better song.  It's a sad, sad situation, and it's getting more absurd.  Well, maybe it's the right song, after all.  Zzzzzz.  Simon loves that song, but he thinks that Von is beginning to become a bit boring.  Randy said it seemed a little serious.  Kara wasn't crazy about the song choice.  Paula believes Von was thinking too hard and wasn't allowing himself to soar.

 

Jasmine Murray (sings Christina Aguilera's "Reflection"):  Well, that was a nice Disney performance.  Who'dve thunk she had such a big voice?  Randy calls her 100% improved, although he thinks the song was a little too big for her.  Kara didn't even know she had that big of a voice.  Paula says she looks lovely and picked a beautiful song.  While wrestling Paula, Simon calls the performance pretty special compared to what she did before, and she's back in the running.

 

Ricky Braddy (sings Stevie Wonder's "Superstition"):  Vocally, he's great, but he still looks a little self-conscious up there.  And Stevie Wonder has been performed to death over the past seven seasons on this show - retire his music now, please.  Kara says Ricky can sing his butt off.  Paula loved the way he loosened up and says he had fun.  Simon thinks he sounded good, but he thought the performance was a bit clunky.  Randy believes the song wasn't quite right for Ricky and thought he tried to do too much with it.

 

Tatiana Del Toro (sings Whitney Houston's "Saving All My Love For You"):  If the judges were going to bring back the crazy, I'd rather they have picked Nick.  At least his silliness is funny.  Ah, well.  She sings the exact same thing she sang the first time.  Wearing Paula's jewelry.  She's got pipes, but is this all she can do?  Tatiana won't stop talking when she's done.  Paula says Tatiana grew an accent she'd never heard before, but she was great.  Simon asks if she can sing more than that song.  Then he and Tatiana get to arguing about it.  Dear God, make it stop.  Randy says it started rough, and it was a mixed bag for him.  Kara calls it the Adventures of Tatiana, since they never know which one they're going to see.

 

Anoop Desai (sings Bobby Brown's "My Prerogative"):  Not a perfect vocal, but he has fun and works the stage.  One of the least boring singers of the show.  This song requires you to wear something other than a polo shirt, though.  Oh, right.  The stylists come later.  Shutting up now.  Anyway...the crowd goes wild.  Simon likens Anoop to an enthusiastic dog.  He says he's not the best vocalist in the competition, but people like him, and he congratulates him.  Randy says he did better than the first time they heard this song in Hollywood.  Kara believes this is the best he ever did it, and she wanted to get up and dance.  Paula calls him a showman with nasty moves.  Heh.

 

Proceeding to Finals (in order announced):  Jasmine Murray, Megan Corkrey, Matt Giraud...and Anoop Desai.

 

Oh joy!  It's a top 13 this year!!  Can I stand it?  [*thwacks head repeatedly against desk*]

 

Review 2009 by Patricia Lowhorn.  For comments, e-mail tricia@lowhorn.org.

 

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